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BLOG STARTED:1st August 2008
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last updated: January/24/09

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Name: Shirley
DOB:24th April 1991
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Thursday, August 21, 2008
@ 10:39 PM

Hopeless.... Today my fear has gotten over me... I did not even went into the examination room... already had been trembling... Before going into the school i told myself several times that Please do not use the singlish, and those habit i have... please don't even reveal it out in front of the examiner. PLEASE DON'T!

Went to the school early and report early... guess what...The examination room is at Library... I was the last two person from the group that i was in. It was really cold... when it was my turn to have the five minutes reading... i was already trembling.

The five minutes reading/preparation, i think of what to say... and what kind of tone to start the passage, keep reminding myself that i CANNOT use those words(erm; then; loh; ya) and have to speak louder.

When i get into the examination room... the teacher says: " You can start reading the passage" When i start to read , the first sentence she said to me was talk louder please... My confident was totally gone... and all the different tone that i was suppose to use was also not been into any usage. Haiz... what am i suppose to say? It was my loudest voice and at that point of time i think i am unable to project it any louder...

Moreover the next component was even more worse, they says i could start to talk about the picture... and i goes the picture depicts a scene of children playing er.... er... MY MIND WAS IN A BLANK ,ALL THAT I WANTED TO SAY WAS FORGOTTEN... but i tried my best to continue on with what comes to my mind...and there goes one of the examiner shaking her head, i had this feeling that she felt that it was boring and i think she must feel that what are u talking ? Felt that it was really hopeless... i think my result going to be very bad as i really think i say it out of point.

Then comes the conversation part... i really wonder how to answer their question...i already feel i am going to fail soon... The conversation part was on Business. If i were to be given a chance to start a business what would i want to start? Oh my god! This question has never came into my mind, i pause for a minute or two, to think of what to say... it really made me crazy... NO IDEA! i just pop out of my mind to say about business on fashion, i just got nothing to say and there i goes "erm... then.... ya ... yup... " all this habit of mine start to come out from my mouth. Feeling that what i say seem so irrelevant and did not answer the question. The examiner begin to shake her head again. After that they ask another question, what are the advantages and disadvantages of working at home and working under someone for eg. in the office?Stunned! What am i suppose to ans?I practically just say advantages is flexible timing and disadvantages is have to tolerate the temper of the others ... then nothing to say and when they ask anymore to add, i just say nothing... OH MY GOSH! this is the worse oral i ever had... Went out of the room then out of the library... i really regret and scream... why am i Scared!

All the way back home i was really feeling very pek chek that i am fearful of this thing... Haiz nothing to say liao... Just have to work hard for this coming paper... but i think it is going to be hard too...




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